Breakthrough

Today, I made a breakthrough. I had fun. Mountain biking. Yep, me. The one who doesn't like mountain biking.

Previously, mountain biking was really tough on me. I wasn't comfortable on it. It was really tough aerobically. My inability to get enough oxygen made me feel dizzy. All the exertion made me feel sick to my stomach.

This was my third attempt to get out there in two weeks. The previous two attempts ended up in me sitting on my butt in front of the tv. But today, I felt a little like myself when I woke up (despite waking up extremely late) so I decided to take advantage and get out there.

I took it easy at first. I thought it was an enormous step for me to just be out there in the first place, especially mountain biking. It's something that even at my best I don't ever really feel like doing. But everything lined up today and I had a good time. My mission was to complete the easy loop in 6 minutes. At first I just told myself that it was a big enough deal for me to be out there and that I didn't have to push if I didn't feel like it. But on my next turn out, I looked down and saw the time and all of a sudden the competitive part of me that had been sleeping for a few weeks woke up and pushed. I ended up finishing that loop in 6:27, the next in 5:48 and the last in 5:19.

I'm really proud of myself, to the point of being ecstatic. And even more excited to feel a little like myself. I'm going to try to grab on to that feeling and not let go. Part of me wonders if it's the new medicine.

To my mountain biking mentor: Your patience and advice helped me to have fun for the first time since I made the semi-large investment in mountain biking. I'm excited that my better fitness, ability to breath and effort have begun to pay off. But more than that, you gave me a glimpse at what I am capable of, at who I really am, and at this time in my life that is invaluable. I look forward to giving some back when I am better.