Mission: Shenanigans in the Bahamas - Accomplished

Friday

In true Danny and Livia traveling style, we cut it pretty close at the airport. To commemorate our Denver trip, we at breakfast at the same place with the late hash browns. Only, this time they weren't late, but our plane was, so we were fine.

Most eventful flight of my life. Seats so small even I felt cramped, which has only happened in a Cessna 152 before. Screaming kids all around. The one behind me keeps reaching behind the seat and kicking the back of my seat. I become irritated. Danny's irritated cause the kids two rows behind are screaming like the plane ride is a rollercoaster. The guy in the row in front of him is in the aisle, and I think what the hell is this guy doing? Then I see him pull out a box, it's a ring. How romantic, to propose on the no-frills low budget airline. But then I see the ring... after that thing, I could see why he might need to save money.

We make our way onto the Royal Caribbean charter and head to the port. Immediately I can tell this ship is nicer than the Carnival one. After a semi-long check-in process, we're on the boat. We immediately buy drinks in flashy cups. Then comes our first lunch, then pool time... with a bucket of beer. We "muster" - nautical language for practicing in case all hell breaks loose. Even this is more organized than the other cruise line. Back up to the deck to watch us pull out. Nothing like the wind in your hair, sun on your face and a drink in hand. Ahhh... vacation.

That night includes dinner with 2 old couples, some comedy, some drinking, some partying, some midnight snacks. Some gambling... this is not a real casino. Danny loses.

Saturday

The people next door are loud. I get up early for breakfast. Danny is not happy about this, but goes with me since he is such a good sport. We change and head up to the deck again. Mango tango in hand, we pull into Nassau. This is better than the time before, no rising at the ass crack of dawn to see the harbor. Not only that, but it's a beautiful clear day.

We go snorkeling. We pick the excursion with the free rum punch at the end. It becomes overcast, there is a storm over Nassau. Evidently God does not want me to be a snorkler. I stay in the water much longer. Fish are gross. Danny is amused that I keep asking him to make them go away. Eventually my approach is not to look, then I won't know if the fish are touching me. On the way back in, the skies clear up.

We wander around Nassau. Danny buys cigars out of a (fake) coach purse at the back of the straw market. I buy a fake coach purse. We're on the hunt for cheap liquor. I succeed in sneaking 1 bottle of rum up to our room, despite being caught.

Naptime, then formal dinner. Meat and wine. More drinking, wandering around. Shooting stars. Latin dancing. Getting down in the "disco" to the crappy dj. My judgement is impaired: I dance to one of those stupid line dances. We go back to the room and exact revenge on the loud people next door.

Sunday

Stupid people next door are loud again. Why does breakfast have to be earlier every day? I go by myself. We can see the parasailing out our window. We take the 'tender' over to Cococay. There is a drunk man, he keeps repeating GO GATORS! Hmm... must be related to Stewart. Floating on mats with a beer in hand... that's paradise.

Parasailing... one of the coolest things I have ever done. They almost don't let us go because of a thunderstorm and reported water spouts. We are the last people on our time to go. Luck is on our side. It's quiet up there, peaceful. Rough landing. Back to the ship.

Naptime, then dinner time, then losing $100 at craps. But I roll for the first time. No beginners luck here. A little dancing, a little wandering, a little more dancing, then an "early" night. It's hard to party hard every day.

Monday

I'm tired from my vacation. Breakfast is too early. I'm sad to leave the boat. Our bill comes, along with a heart attack. Long lines to disembark... I'm tired of people. Too early at the airport... again in true Livia and Danny traveling style. I finish Life of Pi. And start another. Finally, a small seat back to Atlanta.